Germany: Chapter 3.5 Signs of improvement

 It’s been 10 days since my last post, and I wanted to share a quick update. Though progress is turtle slow, I am definitely feeling improvements.

A heart-felt thanks to all of you who have made such sweet comments, here on the blog and other places too. It means so much to me to know people around the world are rooting for my healing! 💜

Today, I took my second jaunt with my walker on the streets of Nüremberg. Monday afternoon was my first venture out of the hotel with my walker instead of the wheelchair since we arrived. I walked through the parking garage, and out across the street to the Thai restaurant behind our hotel. 

Then today I took a much further walk to the Way of Human Rights. If you recall, this is where Jasmin, Loris, Daniel and Laurence prayed for me. Stephen took a photo of me with my walker to mark the milestone. Thanks for your continued good vibes, prayers and support. 💞 Happy Sunday!

Germany: Chaper 3 Healing

One of the reasons we came to Germany was so that I could heal. All through the winter, my life narrowed to little more than daily pain management. By May, I had increased my “10” on the pain scale three times. For those who don’t know, the pain scale is a subjective measure of a person’s pain from their own perspective. “10” is the worst pain you’ve ever experienced. At my routine neurology appointment, I described my pain and my neurologist prescribed some pain medicine. In addition to the pain meds, I modified everything I had control over: diet, movement, stress management. I started a “Happiness project” which mostly involved paintings the things I love in my sketchbook, 

but also watching my potted spring flowers bloom, 

I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2019. Before that I had been diagnosed with Lupus. In 2019, my rheumatologist said I didn’t have Lupus and referred me to a neurologist. It wasn’t until December 2024 that I started infusions for my MS. My new neurologist has over 50 patients on this infusion drug and he’s seen real improvements after a couple of years. So, I have some time to go still before I can expect to see those kind of improvements. 

But of course, there are things I can do to improve the quality of my life in the meantime. Remember that “Happiness Project” I mentioned before. Well, I have been looking forward to a European adventure for awhile now. There were several times in India, where it looked like we would move from Delhi to Geneva, WHO headquarters. It didn’t happen then but after Stephen resigned from his position, but before we had even moved from India, he had several WHO contract opportunities. Back in the US, he worked full-time almost from the time we arrived, with contracts renewing.  Meetings were a challenge for his team though, with a 9hr time difference. So when the lease was up on our cottage on the Puget Sound, we decided to finally make our European adventure happen. We are now in the same time-zone as Geneva. 😊 

So I came to Germany with no small amount of expectations. Which brings me to the W-Curve and why I slide down to the first valley so early in the journey.

The first dip in the W happened for me only a few days after we arrived in Germany. Before coming here we did some research and from what we could ascertain, Germany has quite a bit of wheelchair access. Since I’m using a walker and not a wheelchair, we thought that was a good measure of how easy or difficult it would be for me to get around. While we were still in the states, I thought one way to make our explorations more enjoyable at first, while I’m still doing PT for my balance and general function, was to rent a wheelchair. With Stephen pushing me and my having a built in seat when I needed to rest, we thought we’d be able to explore Germany similar to the way we explored Singapore and Japan in the past, when I could walk miles in a day. 

It seemed like a great plan.

But we hadn’t anticipated the cobblestone streets.

Nürenberg was originally a castle town built in the 11th century. Very likely some of the cobblestones we traverse over today are from those times. 

Different part of the city have better bricks, that are smoother to ride over. 

Some of the streets are paved with asphalt, 

but almost nowhere are there concrete sidewalks so common in the US.

In addition to the cobblestones, there are often only steps up to a shop or restaurant.  And hills! One day Stephen wanted to take me to the Imperial Castle. It ended up being steep hills where I had to have my hands at the ready near the tires to grab them should Stephen slip or fall. (We bought gloves with grip the very first day we tried out the wheelchair.) Then once we got all the way to the castle, it was just too steep, so I had to admire just the outside from below.

So the wheelchair hasn’t been the great solution to my lack of mobility that I thought it might be. But at this point, when I can’t walk very far at all with my walker, it does give us more opportunities to see the sights and enjoy life in Nürenberg more than not having it at all.

Still all the obstacles do highlight how the world is designed for the abled bodied. From my perspective, as someone newly disabled (hopefully only temporarily disabled!) it’s frustrating and maddening when steps bar my entrance, or once inside, displays are so close together I can’t wheel through. 

It’s quite interesting that we are in Nürenberg. The first thing many Americans think of when they hear Nuremberg are the Nuremberg Trials after World War II. Which then makes one think about Hitler, the Nazis and concentration camps. But students of history know that Hitler didn’t start with the Jews. One of first groups of people targeted for extermination were the disabled. To Hitler, such people were, of course, deemed a drain on society and providing no value. Had I live here in the 1930’s, Hitler’s men would have rounded me up and eliminated me. 

For many of us, it’s easy to think of ways disabled people contribute great value to society. Not to mention the obvious human rights aspect! Stephen Hawking, Hellen Keller, Beethoven, Chuck Close, Temple Grandin are just a few famous names of people who were not able-bodied but whose contributions to society are difficult to quantify. 

I like to think I add value to the world. And that being disabled doesn’t change that. I can still paint from a chair, and write. I can still smile and laugh and listen when I talk to someone in person. 

But I have to admit, I do feel invisible to able-bodied people. One example happened just the other day. We were waiting in line to pay at the self checkout at the bookstore and this guy walked right in front of me, paid, and left without ever giving me a second glance. 

But many people do see me. They are more than happy to make space for me to pass them on the sidewalk. Or they will hold a door for me. And then a few days ago, we had the most astonishing example I’ve experienced yet. 

We were sitting at The Way of Human Rights near one of the water features that kids discover and play at, when a couple of German guys came up to us and struck up a conversation. Turns out the wheelchair is what caught their attention. They wanted to pray for me. In the US, I would have politely declined and moved away. But since we are in a foreign country, I thought, “Why not? What can it hurt?” We talked with them a bit, the sort of get-to-know-you types of conversations you might exchange with anyone you’ve just met. Daniel works in a coffee shop near our hotel and Laurence builds kitchens. They were impressed that Stephen had worked for the World Health Organization and now consults for the WHO. Being German, they were much more comfortable with German than English. After they asked some details about my condition, they said they would pray for me in German, would that be okay? Fine by me. They each prayed in turn and after “Amen” they wanted to know if I could get out of the wheelchair and walk. I obliged them by standing up, still holding onto the wheelchair, and said maybe I felt a little different. So they would not feel badly, and because I believe it, I said, “God’s timing.” They nodded heartily to this. They were pleasant to talk to and I’m glad they took the time to stop and show me kindness.

After they walked away, Stephen and I meandered towards the hotel. I was enjoying they cool summer evening and rolling on the smooth tiles, so we were in no rush.

We made it halfway across the block when a young woman came up to me and asked, “Deutsch oder English?” I replied “English.” To which she sighed with relief and said, “Oh good, I’m from Hungary, so English is easier for me.” I then saw she was with a young guy and both were smiling at me. It seemed like one of the first things she said was, “We love Jesus…” to which I immediately piped up and said, “Oh! then maybe you know Daniel and Laurence…” I looked around to see if I could still see them. “They just prayed for me.”

 “That’s what we want to do to,” she said.  “We want to pray for you too. Would that be alright?” I smiled back at them and said, “I’ll take all the prayer I can get!” This made them both smile. Jazmin asked about the details of why I was in a chair. In simple terms, I explained that my spine is crooked, using my hand to draw in the air a kind of S shape. Loris asked if I had any pain. I was surprised he asked and explained that yes, I have a lot of pain and I take three different pain medicines. Jazmin then put her hand on my arm and prayed for me. After she finished. Loris turned to Stephen and asked him if there was anything he’d like them to pray for him about. I was so pleased by this. Immediately, I thought of things I would pray for Stephen, not least of which being a care-giver to me. But I kept my thoughts to myself (with some restraint mind you! 🙃) and let Stephen think about the question. And then Loris prayed for him.

After Loris finished praying for Stephen, the most touching thing happened. Jazmin said to me, “I don’t know if this is right, but I feel like God is telling me that you feel like people don’t see you.” Oh my God! Literally. She went on to say, “But I want you to know God sees you.” I had been trying hard to hold my tears back, but that just made them gush out. I was frantically wiping tears off my face, turned to Stephen and said in a small voice, “That’s true.” Jazmin then asked if she could hug me. I nodded my head. 

We said good bye and Stephen pushed me back to the hotel. Back in our room, I could not help but feel awash with gratitude and joy. And that evening, I took a few steps around the hotel room without the aid of my walker!!!

You don’t have to believe in God, but there’s no denying that human kindness has power. I believe God works through people. 

It would seem that Germany just might be the place for me to heal after all. Here’s hoping!

Germany: Chapter 2 Nüremberg

Nürnberg

I ended my last post remarking that Europe has not been as “easy” as we thought it might be. Of course, this is relative to the other countries we’ve moved to. In rural Tugela Ferry, South Africa we drove 3hrs for groceries. I hung our laundry to dry on the fence of our yard while stamping fire ants off my feet. And we slept under a mosquito net because the mosquitos there carry diseases that could kill us. In Myanmar, we had to turn on, and off, the pump to have water in our apartment. Once we went out shopping and forgot to turn off the pump. We came back to a flooded apartment and narrowly avoided being electrocuted. In Delhi, India, the air quality is the 2nd worst in the world. We had three air filters that ran 24/7. Masks were a must any time we left the apartment. I even dried all our clothes indoors, despite the dry heat outside, to make sure as little pollution as possible got into our clothes and linens. And to top it off the washing machine was outside the apartment! By comparison, Germany, we thought, would just be incredibly easy. 

Which made me think about the cultural immersion concept my Whitworth professor introduced me to. I’ve referred to the “W-Curve” a lot during our international experiences over the years. The first time I ever wrote about the “W-Curve” was a week in to our move to South Africa. Click here to read what “falling off the W-Curve means”. 😳 At this point, I can add more complexity to the process of cultural immersion, given my personal experiences in a number of countries now. My professor’s W-curve theory was probably only an introduction to cultural immersion, helpful to college students taking their first trip abroad. Still, I find it a useful starting point for thinking and writing about what it’s like to immerse myself in a new country and culture.

To recap the “W-curve”…

Entering a new country is full of excitement and anticipation {the first high point in the W}. But after some time, provided you engage with the local culture and local people, things start to feel less fun and you start to long for the familiarity of your home culture {the first low point of the W}. But gradually, you start to accept what’s different, learn to deal with the challenges, and even embrace the newness and uniqueness of the country you are visiting/living in {the middle high point of the W}. The last low point is after your trip has ended and you return home. At first, upon returning to your home country you feel happy-both about your adventure abroad and being home {still at the middle high point of the W}. But, if your experience abroad was a good one, there comes a point where you start to miss things about your adventure abroad {the last low point on the W}. Generally, people mesh their lives back in their home country with the memories of their international adventure and they get back to the top of the W, completing the letter.

Something, cultural immersion just beckons. And that’s what led Stephen and me to seek this new adventure in Germany. In many ways, we are starting to feel more “at home” living in another country. 

To apply the “W-Curve” to our German adventure…

Once all the work of getting ready to leave was done and we were finally waiting to board our first flight, I felt joyful and light. We flew out of an airport I hadn’t been in for 35 years. Needless to say, it was quite different! In the new addition there was a grand piano with a sign on it that read “Please play the piano”. Although we stopped taking my digital piano with us after South Africa, and I rarely get the chance to touch a piano, let alone practice any more, there’s still a lot of muscle memory in my fingers and music in my ears from all those years of lessons and study. It was a bit out of character for me, but for some reason, I just wanted to play the piano. With an airport full of strangers to hear, both the good and the bad of whatever I played, I sat down at the grand piano. Without any warmup, I played Für Elise by Beethoven, a German composer. It was fun! When I finished playing, people nearby clapped. {You’ll notice I’m wearing a mask in this photo. My infusion was only a week before our flight. I was still immunocompromised and couldn’t risk getting sick.} 

Even though Für Elise is a children’s piece and I’ve been playing it since the 5th grade, it’s a crowd pleaser. When I was a piano teacher, my students and their parents enjoyed hearing me play it. And recently, Jon Batiste released his Jazz take on Für Elise for his Beethoven album. {link here}

So that was the start of our journey.

Then the flights were good. I half expected them to be worse, given that I’ve experienced some pretty awful flights and now my mobility is terrible. But our journey ended in Europe this time. For our other international moves, Europe was only halfway to our destination. Then our first night in a hotel in Nürnberg was amazing. The beds were just right, we each had individual duvets (a lovely European habit) and the sandwiches Stephen bought for us from the airport bakery were delicious. I ate three of them! (Not all at one time. 🤣😂🤪)

Not only that, my walker arrived that evening. Airport staff brought it over to the hotel. We didn’t even have to go retrieve it!

From the Movenpick airport hotel, we took a taxi to our new hotel in the center of Nǔrenberg. The drive was so fun. I saw crops as we drove and marveled that they were so close to the town. Zero food miles. 

As we checked in, the staff were incredibly nice and then the complimentary breakfast on the first morning was delicious.

But little challenges started to present themselves. The hotel room turned out to be a little tight for my walker. I had to maneuver carefully to get around, making several little turns to get from the kitchen, around the bed, to get to the couch. Think about operating a car on a narrow street or other small space. 

The appliances are multi-purpose: a microwave oven, a washer/dryer combination machine. And everything is labeled in German. Stephen found a manual for the microwave oven and which buttons to use for the microwave and which ones to use for the oven. Only neither of us could see the buttons very easily. The print is faint and they aren’t backlit. So I put little stickers above the buttons to make things less difficult. 

Then there was the washer/dryer. I used a Google translate app to get some translation to English. This was only moderately helpful. I was able to run the washer but I could not seem to get the dryer to work.

Trocknen mean dry and when I turned the knob there were only two choices out of all the different labels! And both of those two choices only gave me 13 minutes of dryer time. I kept running the dryer 13 minutes at a times until I had run the machine for a total of more than an hour. Still, the clothes felt just as damp as when I started trying to dry them.

Our first thought was to just give up on the dryer and air dry the clothes, so Stephen took some of them out and draped them various places around the room. But I was indignant, “This is Germany! If the dryer doesn’t work, surely we can get it repaired for goodness sake!” Still we both were a bit reluctant to ask the hotel for help. Our experiences, in all the other countries we’ve moved to, had taught us we were pretty much on our own. Just like Mark Watney in The Martian. He did get some help from NASA, but mostly he had to figure things out on his own.

I did eventually call, and the hotel was really prompt. The repair guy came to our room in less than an hour, spoke fluent English, and showed me quickly how to add time for the dryer. I can’t say I’m the biggest fan of the combination washer/dryer, but having a machine right in the room is a definite plus. I’ll take it! 

I’m also happy to report that I went back to the hotel café, ordered a cappuccino “extra hot” from the same waiter, and it was a perfect coffee! Not only that, we went into a local bookshop, I practiced my German (Deutsch) a little bit, and as we were leaving the shopkeeper said to me, “Your German is great.” 😊 

If it were only these little challenges we had to problem-solve, I might have not had my first slide down the “W”. A larger challenge was the tipping point. But as that’s a longer story and this post is already pretty long, I’ll end here and leave you with some photos of this beautiful city.